Novels
Available
from Lulu.com
in print or as download. Sample
pages
Now
available on Amazon uk and
Amazon.com
|
|
Sally enters the Cooks' Academy at the age of 34. Two husbands under her belt,
she has waved the latest lover goodbye, and is ready to take on whatever
fate throws at her. Coping with the demands of her two children - Cleo -
the "Angel from Heaven" who turns out to be anything but, and
"Bloody Alex", her out of control twelve year old son, who
sleeps by day and roams the streets by night, plus the punishing schedule
set by the charismatic - but deadly - Dr Fisher - would be more than
enough for most people, but Sal's problems don't stop there! Hounded by
Social Security, persecuted by Dastardly Derek, a landlord with a penchant
for wrecking houses with the tenants still in them, tormented by her
growing obsession with the sexually rampant Dr Fisher, Sal muddles through
life with no very clear idea of what or where she wants to be - apart from
her overwhelming conviction that the kitchen is her 'spiritual home'.
The adventures of
Sally and her fellow students as they struggle to understand why they are
constantly told they will all pass, even though the lecturers seem to talk
about nothing but sex, and the very real hard work they do in the kitchen,
are told at a fast, racy pace - the way Sally lives her life. Apart from
anything else, this is an interesting commentary on social conditions in
the nineteen seventies and the struggle of a single mother to surmount
them. Whatever you
think of Sally's morals, you can't help admiring her guts, her
determination to stay the pace . . . . and her cracking love life!
|
Available
from Lulu.com
in print or as download. Sample
pages
Now available on
Amazon uk and
Amazon.com
|
|
Sally moves on
in this fast-paced second volume of her adventures. Handed a certificate
of competence by the Cooks' Academy and slung onto the job market at the
ripe age of 35, Sal wonders who on earth is going to employ someone so
over-qualified and under-experienced. So when Cyril Groot, the World's
Ugliest Man, reveals that there is a vacancy for a cook at the Zoo where
he is doing a summer season, Sal jumps at it. Leaving her offspring on her
mother's doorstep, with a £10 note pinned to their clothing, Sal takes
off for the wilds of North Yorkshire, where she quickly finds that the
chefs are more dangerous than the animals! Sweating in the intense heat of
one of the hottest summers on record, Sal develops muscles as she rolls
pastry for pies that would gladden the heart of Desperate Dan. The kitchen
is a pretty fair approximation to Hell–and, as the beer-swilling Head
Chef tells her - “If you can stand this you can stand anything” – he
should know, he is the worst thing in it. After hours, Sal quickly homes
in on the nightly ‘cabaret’ – a bizarre re-enactment of a 17th
century hanging said to have taken place on that very spot, where a bunch
of lads from the local village dress up and kick hell out of each other in
the name of art. Sal’s arrival stirs up some interesting sub-currents as
the Victim and the Jailer compete for her attention.All too soon the
school holidays arrive and the notorious Cleo and Alex escape from their
grandmother’s clutches and head for the zoo – posing Sal a problem,
not least in the romance department, Cleo now an extremely beautiful
fifteen year old, knocking her mother into the shade, and throwing the
monkeys into fits of jealousy when their keeper gets the hots for her.
Life never runs smoothly, but Sally gets what she can out of it, as
always! Be prepared for sex and humour, and a different take on life.
|
Available
from Lulu.com
in print or as download. Sample
pages
Now available on
Amazon uk and
Amazon.com
|
|
Sally is at the peak of her career
when she makes a disastrous decision to take on the challenge of managing
the catering at a sports and leisure complex. When she arrives for the
interview the place is not even half built. Stumbling over bricks and
planks on the building site she enters a dingy caravan and falls in love
with the biggest rogue she will ever have the misfortune to meet. Jimmy
Pinchbeck on his day off, rough, bearded, and covered in cement dust, is
just what she has been looking for. For Jimmy, nuts about Abba and crazy
for blondes, she is his dream come true - and when she reveals she can
cook, he is hooked. Sally however, knows instinctively that
the job is not what it is cracked up to be, but takes it anyway when it
becomes clear it is the only way of getting to see anything of Jimmy. What
follows is a trial of strength between two people hopelessly in love with
their diametrical opposites. Jimmy, the archetypal conman, and Sally the
dedicated chef with the highest work ethic in the business. Read about
shenanigans with staff and jollies in the jacuzzi as the sports club
lurches from one financial crisis to another and Jimmy talks his way out
of everything while Sally struggles to hold the catering enterprise
together and defend her staff from his depredations. You will adore Anna,
the trainee girl chef who has Sally's heart fluttering, bust a gut
laughing at the antics of Hector, the hilarious guest house owner whose
establishment Sally books into, and be intrigued by the machinations of
Michael, the mysterious undercover Irish joiner. Not forgetting . . . .
"Jimmy Pinchbeck, the most
Faustian character I ever met, every time I go to Lancashire I expect to
bump into him strolling down the street, cigar clamped between his
teeth and a blonde on each arm . . . . an unforgettable creation -
George Melly."
|
Go
to page
|
|
|
|